Susie Fucking Home-maker

FUCK! I'm having an identity crisis right now. I'm not working. Which means that I am home. Which means that I'm not gonna pay for day care for the 3 year old… Which means that I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF A 3 YEAR OLD, ALL DAY, ALL BY MY SELF. It also means that I'm spending a lot of time doing things like laundry which I hate love, dishes make me want to kill myself so happy, and just generally cleaning, cooking, and bein the bitch. *Joy* I have an all new respect for those crazy (I mean *awesome*) people who actually want to be at home all day watching Yo Gabba Gabba and singing songs like There's a Party in my Tummy!. Now don't get me wrong, I love my kids with my entire being, it's just that sometimes I wanna duct tape them to something.

In case you haven't noticed, I've also spent a lot of time looking up random shit on the internet. The problem is, I can't look up the kind of stuff that I wanna because what if Jeremy randomly looked at the history on my laptop and noticed that I was looking up "gay+dog+clown+sex" on Bing? How would I explain myself? I couldn't. That's the point. And then the jig would be up. I would no longer be "D, my girl friend who is only kinda crazy sometimes, like when she's on her period", I would be "D, my ex girlfriend that I had committed to a psych ward to give me time to pack my shit, because this chick is FUCKING NUTS". But come ON, who doesn't want to see gay dog clown sex? Exactly.

With all of this internet time, I've also spent a lot of the last few days on the Facebook. Playing with apps. Back when I had a life, I scoffed at apps. I was all "Why the fuck would I want to pretend to have a farm?" or "Why the fuck would I care about being a Mafia Boss?". NOW however I spend all of my time harassing my friends to JOIN MY DAMN FARMVILLE BECAUSE I NEED TO UPGRADE TO A 18x18 SIZED PLOT. So I can plant more shit. And make more money. I currently have 35,761 dollars in Farmville, which is approximately 35,760 more than I have in real life. You don't even wanna know how much I have in Mafia Wars. I'll give you a hint. I'm rich bitch. I could buy you. And your mom. Losers.

0_o